Sex Toys Are About Anatomy and Pleasure, Not Gender

Anatomical terms for body parts, groundbreaking.

One of the first things that people notice about Bonjibon is the language we use. Despite selling pleasure products, at Bonjibon, we don't use his and hers as descriptors. Or for men and for women. Or for wife and for husband, etc. This is an active choice that we made when before we launched.

Why don't we use gender as a descriptor at Bonjibon?

Accuracy and inclusivity. 

We believe that when we talk about bodies, it is more accurate to talk about parts than cultural norms.

We also believe that we shouldn't have to accept gender categories in order to shop for good sex toys.

How is it more accurate and inclusive?

Categories at Bonjibon reflect anatomy and pleasure, not gender at all. This is really important, since men may have vulvas, women may have penises, and there is no actual correlation between gender and genetalia. Gender non-conforming folks don't even have the chance of being categorized correctly under binary standards. Additionally, genetalia itself doesn't fall neatly into two categories. About 1-2 babies for every 100 in the US are born intersex. That is, their external and/or internal sex organs do not fit into the male/female binary. As far as we're concerned, it's most accurate to be specific.

There is more variation between afab folks and other afab folks than between amab (Assigned Female at Birth and Assigned Male at Birth) folks as a category. This level of variation is reflected anatomically and in experience (Don't forget, people are authorities on their own bodies and experiences.) So, it'd be ineffective to group people according to their assigned sex at birth. Since our culture largely categorizes people according to binary gender, using male or female, for women or men, the pleasure industry is often not only inaccurate, it's exclusive (And not in the fun Soho House way). 

Inclusivity matters. We want people to be able to shop for their needs, without being being forced into a gender binary. So, instead of being grouped with "Women" because a customer has a vulva, they can search according to just that - having a vulva. 

Taking a step back and evaluating how we categorize people, as well as products, is a pillar that Bonjibon grew upon and relies on. Deconstructing the relationship between gender and genitals is one way that we try to make shopping with us as easy and easeful as possible. 

Read more about this at Best Health Magazine's article,"Sex Toys Don't Need Genders."